The Doctor smiled broadly as he stepped out of the TARDIS into the yard
by the kitchen of the house he still thought of fondly as the Nut-hutch.
Oh, it was a long time now since he had come here in the early 1970s with
Jo.
“Jo?” He looked at the young woman who came to the door and
for a moment he thought it WAS her, as she looked in those days. He wondered
if he’d got the date wrong AGAIN. “No, it can’t be,
can it?” Then he realised. “Stella? Oh, you’ve grown
a lot since I saw you last.”
“Not THAT much, Doctor,” Stella answered in a pleasant Welsh
Accent. “It was only five years. At least it WAS for us. I suppose
you’ve been hopping around the universe for fifty years without
thinking to drop in on us?”
“Something like that,” he said. But he was puzzled all the
same. He hadn’t seen Stella since she was two and a half years old,
when he brought Wyn home after their year of adventures. She shouldn’t
even remember him.
She looked twenty or twenty-one now. So she would have been sixteen or
thereabouts five years ago in her own personal time.
No. He hadn’t met her when she was that age. He would have remembered.
“Doctor!” Wyn appeared from the garage door. K9 Mk 4.5 whirred
along beside her as she ran to hug him. “It’s great to see
you. How have you been?”
“One of you make me a cup of tea, milk, two sugars, and I’ll
tell you,” he answered her. “K9, have you been a good puppy?”
“Affirmative, Master,” he replied and his robot tail and ears
wagged enthusiastically. The Doctor laughed as he stepped into the big
kitchen that was the heart of the Nut-hutch. Wyn directed him to a battered
but very comfortable sofa that rested against one wall. Stella sat beside
him and K9 hovered by his feet while Wyn made the tea. The comfortable
feeling of being among friends overwhelmed him. He sighed with something
like happiness.
“Jasmin said you were coming,” Wyn said as she brought the
tea and sat down with him. “But we didn’t know whether you
WOULD make it here or not. I mean, you never just go from one place to
the next. You take detours all over the place.”
“That I do,” he said. “I have to admit I did take rather
a long one this time.”
“How long?” Wyn asked him.
“thirty three years,” he answered.
“Come again!” Wyn choked on her tea. “Seriously? You
took thirty-three years to get from Manchester to Llanfairfach?”
“Yes.”
“You REALLY should have taken the train.”
“Where did you go for all that time?” Wyn asked him. She looked
closely at his face. He really didn’t look any different, as far
as she could remember. It had been five years since she saw him last,
but she was sure she remembered him just as he was now. Still looking
about thirty five or so. YOUNGER than she was, now. In all the years,
since she was a teenager, he hadn’t changed a bit. He was still
a good looking bloke with soft brown eyes that twinkled with mischief,
a mouth that smiled more easily than it frowned and a boundless energy
about him, as if he ran on Duracells.
Not even a line under his eyes told of the lifetime he claimed to have
had in the course of one day of HER life.
“I went to Forêt,” he said. “To see my family.”
“Oh.” Wyn did the maths. thirty-three years would make Dominique
something like seventy-five years old by the time he left again. “Oh…
Doctor… You mean…”
“I kept my promise to her. To love her all her life.”
He sipped his tea slowly as he thought back. The one thing about being
a Time Lord, he could recall things easily. He recalled the couple of
pleasant days he spent with Jasmin and Alec and Ali. He recalled the not
so pleasant interlude in 1971 that had led to his decision to take that
far longer detour.
He remembered with absolute clarity arriving on Forêt .
The TARDIS materialised on the platform outside the work-hut. It was
dark and it was cold. There was a wind blowing freezing sleet through
the trees and it was quite unpleasant climbing up the wooden ladder to
the living quarters above.
The door to the bedroom was closed but he lifted the latch and pushed
it open. He closed it again quickly and secured it against the wind. He
used his sonic screwdriver in penlight mode to give him enough light to
see by.
Dominique was asleep in the big bed covered in fur blankets. Angeletta’s
crib was beside it, but empty. He was worried for a moment until he saw
their six month old daughter snuggled beside her. He sat on the edge of
the bed and reached to touch them both. Angeletta seemed hotter than she
should be and she coughed worryingly as she stirred in her sleep. Dominique
stirred too and gave a shocked gasp that turned to a cry of delight as
she recognised the touch of her lover’s hand on her cheek.
“Doctor,” she whispered joyfully. “Oh, my love.”
As he took the child in his arms she sat up and lit the lamp by her bedside.
In its warm light he looked at her face, then he looked at the baby. She
DID look feverish.
“She has a cold,” Dominique said. “That’s why
I had her in the bed with me, keeping her warm. There’s some medicine
here for her if she wakes.”
The Doctor touched the baby’s forehead. Yes, he thought, it was
just a cold. He concentrated hard and drew off the heat from her body
so that her temperature was closer to normal for a Human child. He took
the herbal medicine and put a little into her mouth. She didn’t
like the bitter taste, but she swallowed enough to help her sleep again
untroubled.
“You lie down again with her,” he said. “I’ll
join you in a moment.” Dominique did so as he slipped off his coat
and jacket and tie and his shoes and then blew out the lamp before sliding
under the covers beside his wife and baby. He closed his eyes and sighed
happily as he let warm, peaceful sleep come upon him.
The next morning felt like the first day of a whole new life. And it WAS.
He began by changing into the homespun clothes that Dominique kept in
a linen box for his visits to her. He put on a thick fur coat against
the winter weather then took his suit and coat and shoes and his sonic
screwdriver, too, to the TARDIS. He put the console in low power stand
by and left the clothes on the sofa. Then he turned and stepped out of
it. He locked the door and took the key to the tool room, hanging it on
a nail near the roof where nobody would touch it. He wasn’t going
to need it for a long while.
Then he went back to the living quarters. Dominique was making breakfast.
Angeletta was lying in her day crib, awake but quiet. Dominic was sitting
by her.
“Father,” he said. “Mother told me you came to her in
the night. I thought at first she meant in a dream.”
“Not this time,” The Doctor answered. “From now on,
neither of us need dream. I will be here.”
“For how long?” Dominique asked. That was always the burning
question whenever he visited.
“Forever,” he answered. “Or as near to it as matters
to you. I promised I would be with you till your dying day and I am here
to make good that promise.”
“You….” She was startled by that proposal. “You
will give up the stars for me?”
“Yes,” he said. “For you, and Dominic and Angeletta.”
He lifted the child in his arms. She looked at him with big brown eyes
like his own. “I’m here for you, my little girl,” he
said to her. “I’m here to see you grow up and never miss a
moment of it.”
“You really mean it?” Dominic asked. “You really won’t
go away again?”
“I mean it,” he promised. `
“Really?” Wyn said, surprised. “You really were prepared
to give it all up? Travelling in the TARDIS, seeing different planets,
different people?”
“For her, for them, yes I was,” he answered. “I was
ready to live my life one day after the other like everyone else in the
universe does. I wanted that.”
He had arrived only a month into a cold, hard, snow-rain season, one
of the coldest in living memory, so the elders of the village said. The
Doctor took their word for it. He could probably have verified the claim
using the TARDIS computers. He could probably have got accurate predictions
of how long it would be before the cold-rain season came around again,
or the warm-rain that heralded spring. But he left the key on the hook
in the workroom. He had made his mind up to live with Dominique and their
children as a Forêtean. The TARDIS didn’t belong in that life.
Its technology had no place here.
So he did as all the other men of the village did. He broke sticks to
burn in the stove that warmed the room and cooked their food. He thawed
his hands out over it after slicing up joints of frozen meat from the
store of food the villagers all shared and bringing it home for Dominique
to make into a nourishing stew. They all snuggled together under warm
furs and waited out the cold weather. Angeletta recovered from her cold,
but Dominique and Dominic both went down with fevers and The Doctor pounded
up dried leaves and bark and boiled them together to make the bitter medicine
until they got well again.
He got good at making the medicine. He examined the bark and the leaves
and determined that they were a natural analgesic. He found a way of mixing
it with boiled dried fruits and making a syrup that the children found
more pleasant than the bitter brew. He became a doctor who made house
calls as he brought the medicine to others who were brought down by the
cold. They were a hardy race, used to the rigours of their climate, and
there were few more serious illnesses. Some of the most vulnerable, the
very old and the very young, suffered more severely than those in between,
but that was only natural. He tried not to feel it too keenly when the
very oldest of the village, an old woman of 96, passed away quietly despite
his ministrations. That was natural to this world and these people.
The snow-rain gave way to the cold rain, a moderately milder time when
the rain poured non-stop and the sound of it on the roof day and night
became something he hardly noticed after the first few days. It became
a part of the pattern of life. Braving the rain to go down to the workroom
with Dominic and fetch up bags of raw silk and fresh paints so that they
could work in the warmth of the living quarters was part of that pattern,
too.
These were days when the drumming of the rain was the percussion section
of the music of their lives. They sang as they worked and they worked
through the hours of natural light. When it got dark they lit lamps and
they ate their evening meal and they enjoyed each other’s company.
At night Angeletta slept in her crib beside the bed where her parents
renewed their passionate love for each other every time they blew out
the lamp and reached to hold each other beneath the bedcovers.
Warm-rain came, and it was possible to throw open the shutters. They were
able to move the spinning wheel and loom and silk painting frame back
to the workroom and Dominique cleaned the living quarters and made them
fresh and homely. The Doctor went over the floor of the room with a sanding
tool and smoothed it carefully and then coated it with a natural resin
that sealed the wood so that there was no chance of Angeletta picking
up a splinter as she began to crawl and make her first attempts at walking.
Dominique spread the floor with clean rag rugs that she had woven and
Angeletta safely played on them.
In the glow of the warm sun season, with the trees budding green again,
Angeletta said her first word. The Doctor grinned like an idiot and hugged
her tight as she said it again to prove it wasn’t a fluke. He was
proud that her first word had been ‘papa’. He hadn’t
been there when Dominic was that age. He had called another man father
for most of his childhood.
This time he got it exactly right.
“You big soppy article,” Wyn teased him as he grinned like
an idiot remembering. “But I suppose I can understand. I remember
mum with Stella when she started talking. Course, we spent the next fourteen
years trying to shut her up….”
Stella gave her sister a scowl that rivalled Wyn’s best and proved
that they most certainly WERE sisters.
“Ignore her, Doctor,” she said. “I think it’s
sweet. I bet you were a great dad to her.”
“Well, I tried to be,” he said. “That’s all anyone
can do, really.”
The warm-sun and the hot-sun seasons of that first year were punctuated
by Angeletta’s baby milestones. She was just over a year old when
she walked. From then on life in a tree top village became hazardous.
She wanted to walk everywhere and there were so many places where she
couldn’t. The Doctor and Dominic between them spent many hours making
sure every balcony rail around their home was secure and impossible for
a curious child to climb over with tragic results. The Doctor had never
been worried about this lifestyle before he had a year old daughter who
could walk into trouble. Even when Dominique pointed out that Dominic
had been a year old once, and had walked safely on the same platforms
he still worried for her.
“If anything happened to my Angel,” he said as he lay by Dominique’s
side on a sultry hot-sun evening looking up at the stars from the high
observation platform. “My hearts would break.”
“Nothing is going to happen to her,” Dominique assured him.
“She’s curious, of course. She’s adventurous. She gets
it from her father.”
“Not so adventurous now,” he said. “Given up adventure.
Retired to spend more time with my family. That’s what they say
on Earth. That’s what I’m doing.”
“I’m so glad,” Dominique said. “So very glad.”
“Do you regret that I didn’t do it sooner? I missed so much
of Dominic’s life.”
“I DID love Jareth,” she told him of the man who had been
Dominic’s stepfather and her comfort when The Doctor was not there.
“I WAS happy. The only really sad time was after he died and I didn’t
know if you were alive or dead. After that, after that wonderful year
we had together, then I knew we never really would be apart, ever. I only
missed being able to reach out and touch you when you were gone. I never
missed your love. I would look up at the stars and know you were there
among them. And I felt all your love. Then you were here for a while and
you left me with my little Angel growing within me. And I was as happy
as it was possible to be. I knew when you returned to me you would be
delighted. Instead THEY came and I thought all was lost. That was the
only time my faith ever wavered. When I was in pain and my son was taken.
For one brief time I thought you would not come, and our son would be
lost, and our daughter too. Oh, but forgive me, husband, for doubting
you.”
“I’ll never leave you again,” he told her. “Never.”
And in token of that, the next day he began to cut planks of wood and
he nailed them in place around the TARDIS, encasing it in a wooden sarcophagus.
He didn’t need it. He wouldn’t need it for a very long time.
He lived on Forêt now. He was a citizen of Forêt. He had no
use for a time and space ship. As much as he loved the TARDIS, had called
it home, had called it friend, for so long, he didn’t need it now.
So he made it safe, and he made it hidden. By the time the rains of the
cold seasons had battered it and the warm seasons came around again, by
the time Angeletta was two years old, the wood would be the same shade
as the wood around it and they would all walk past it without thinking
about what lay inside.
Angeletta would know her father wasn’t a native of this planet,
of this village. He was too different in so many ways to disguise that
fact. But she didn’t need to have dreams of what else there was
out there. Let the stars be the lights that shine down on her at night,
and no more.
“You hid your TARDIS?” Stella and Wyn were both astonished
by that. They couldn’t quite believe it of him. “You hid it
even from yourself?”
“Yes. I didn’t need the temptation there. I didn’t need
to be reminded that I had any other life but the one I was living. Not
that I WAS tempted. I was happy.”
“Weaving and spinning, and cutting wood?” Wyn looked at him
curiously. “You really WERE happy, doing all those things? You,
the most intelligent man in the universe, with so much knowledge of so
many things? You really were happy doing manual labour?”
“Yes,” he assured her. “Well, apart from the hunting
and the butchering. I could never really love the job of skinning a boar
and slicing up its flesh. But I had to do that so that we could eat in
the cold seasons. Besides, for all my knowledge of the universe, there
is so much satisfaction in doing a practical job. Making silk, or wool
clothes that would keep us warm, putting up a platform, building a walkway
that will be used, salting the meat we will eat. These were the things
that needed to be done every day. And I went to bed tired at night, knowing
that a good day’s work was done.”
Wyn reached and touched his hands. They were different to when she first
knew him. They were harder, with callouses and rough skin, toughened by
working with them.
One of the biggest jobs was in the year Angeletta was four, when he had
been there three full cold seasons. As soon as the warm rain dissipated
he and Dominic and Marcas, and other men of the village set to work on
building a new platform on a tree next to the one The Doctor and Dominique
lived on. A strong platform and a new house of three rooms, one above
the other, and a walkway across the top level that joined it to Dominique’s
house. They worked through the warm sun season, and in the cooler parts
of the day in the hot sun season, and again as the heat became less intense.
Before the warm sun gave way to rain again it was finished and the rooms
were furnished with rag rugs and a sturdy bed and silk hangings and a
stove to warm it in winter. And on the appointed day Dominic and Thérèse,
his sweetheart from his boyhood, were married. Angeletta was a charming
flower girl. Dominique cried to see her son become a man at last. She
cried more as he took his wife and went to live in that other tree house.
The Doctor comforted her by reminding her that he was so close that they
could still have a conversation if they just raised their voices slightly.
And anyway, both Dominic and his wife came every day to work at the silk
spinning and weaving and painting in the workshop, first with the window
shutters open and the warm rain a pleasant sound, and the smell of the
wet leaves a pleasant scent, then with the shutters tightly shut against
the cold rain that stung the face and soaked their clothes.
Then as the coldest weather set in the young couple abandoned their new
home and as the blizzard’s battered the village they slept in Dominic’s
old room and The Doctor and Dominique were snug and warm in the room below,
with Angeletta in her own child bed in the corner of the room. The five
of them saw the cold weather through and The Doctor was a doctor once
more as he daily monitored Thérèse’s progress through
her first pregnancy. It was the first time in many seasons that he had
used any of those abilities he didn’t learn on Forêt. Now,
his ability to touch her gently and reach in with his mind and see the
growth and development of the child within her was useful.
He was disappointed at first that this child was far more Human than even
Dominic and Angeletta both were. He had expected his own genes to be passed
on more strongly to his grandchild. He had expected two hearts, and the
longer gestation period of his own species. But his grandchild was Human,
with one heart, with red blood. And it was right that it should be. The
little boy that was born just before the hot sun season set in was destined
to grow up on Forêt, to be a woodcutter or a joiner or a carpenter,
or a spinner and weaver, or most probably all of those things in turn.
He had no need for two hearts, no need to be different from the other
children of the village, of the planet.
He wondered occasionally why his and Dominique’s offspring were
more Human than Time Lord. After all, many centuries ago his first born
child had been a Time Lord. His first grandchild, Susan, was of Gallifreyan
blood. And his other incarnation, the one called Nine when the two of
them were together, was the patriarch of a family of new Time Lords.
Just fate, he thought. The genetic lottery. And besides, he would not
have changed one single cell that made up his grandson, named Philippe,
in the simple but emotional Ceremony of Naming in the Hall of Devotions.
He was just too proud to be a grandfather again, to hold the child in
his arms as often as his mother would allow him, and for as long as his
own little girl would allow him to give attention to another child.
“You’re a granddad!” Wyn exclaimed and Stella grinned
widely.
“I’ve been a granddad before,” he reminded her. “But
this time was different. Because I had nothing else to worry about except
them. And all we had to worry about was the ordinary things any parent
worried about.”
Some of those worries cast a shadow over their happiness in the snow
season of that year. It was another very cold, bitter time, and with it
came a sickness that swept through several of the villages at once. The
Doctor identified it as a Human illness called Whooping Cough and he and
those in the other villages skilled with the special leaves and tree bark
worked hard to fight it, but there were inevitable failures. Again the
oldest and the youngest were vulnerable. Several old people of their village
succumbed and were buried in the forest below. They were mourned, but
not so keenly as the four children, a boy and three girls, who died. And
nobody mourned more than The Doctor, not even Dominic, when Thérèse,
suffering from the same disease, lost the second child she was carrying.
As that long, sad night passed and he comforted his daughter in law as
best he could, he thought for the first time of the TARDIS and the fact
that he COULD have fetched vaccinations against diseases like this, could
have given them to all of the villages. He could have saved everyone.
That regret haunted him more when, with his mother still sick and grieving
in bed, little Philippe became ill. He and Dominique and Dominic took
turns caring for Thérèse and for Philippe in turn and they
both pulled through, but Philippe had suffered brain damage. He would
be retarded all his life. The extent of the damage would be impossible
to gauge until he was older, but The Doctor guessed he might be blind,
possibly unable to speak or walk properly.
As the news stunned the whole family he wandered to the platform where
the weathered planks covered the TARDIS. He leaned his head against the
rough wood, pressed his hands against it. He could feel the very faint
vibration of the TARDIS in low power mode, still.
“Mon Père,” Dominic said, coming to him with a warm
fur coat that he put around his shoulders. “Come inside. You will
catch your death of cold, and none of us could bear that.”
“It would take a long time before I could die of cold,” he
answered. “Why couldn’t little Philippe have my strength?
Why did he have to… I could have… Dominic, I am sorry. I could
have saved him. The TARDIS…. Modern drugs….”
“Nobody blames you, father.” Dominic assured him. “It
has always been our choice to live without those things. We could have
had trade with planets that have those drugs you speak of long ago. We
preferred our simple lifestyle. You chose to live that life with us. We
ALL made the choice. All of us who call ourselves Forêteans. Philippe
is alive. We’re grateful for that. The rest we don’t know
yet. Only time will tell. Perhaps we will be lucky.”
“Time.…” The Doctor smiled sadly. “But I’m
a Time Lord. I should be able….”
“You can’t turn BACK time. You always said so. So don’t
regret anything. You’re here. You are a comfort and source of strength
for us all.”
“And you are mine, my son,” he answered, hugging him tightly.
He let himself be led back to the living quarters. Nobody DID blame him.
They all loved him too much for the thought to cross their minds. And
if he was their strength, they were his as they came through that hard
winter and took stock of it together.
“Was the little boy blind?” Stella asked as The Doctor looked
around him and smiled through eyes that had become suddenly moist.
“Partially,” The Doctor answered as he accepted a fresh cup
of tea and a plate of ginger nut biscuits. “His brain was damaged
by the illness. He had sight in only one eye and he was ‘slow’
to do all of the things a child should. He walked late, he talked only
after a long struggle. Teaching him to hold a spoon and feed himself was
hard. It was difficult for us all. His parents never gave up on him, though.
Thérèse loved him dearly. Dominic, too. And I….”
Everyone said The Doctor could not have loved his grandson more if he
tried. He never neglected his own little girl. He always found time to
be with her, watching her run and play and become a sturdy, active child
who could soon climb trees like a monkey and take her first lessons on
the baton haute arena by the time she was seven. But the little boy was
always with him, too. And The Doctor discovered that Philippe was only
quiet and withdrawn among those who communicated with the spoken word.
With a paintbrush and a piece of cloth or wood or parchment he could tell
a whole story. And the stories were ones he got from his grandfather without
need of spoken words.
The boy was six when The Doctor first realised he was telepathic. He was
sitting out on the balcony with Philippe by his side as always, when one
of the youngsters, one of Angeletta’s friends, asked him about the
‘Robos’, the enemy that afflicted Forêt a long time
before they were born and now lived on in legend. The Doctor had told
them only the vaguest detail. He didn’t want them to think too much
about such things. But when he looked at the parchment in front of him
Philippe had painted a Dalek that was exact in detail. He had seen the
picture in his grandpapa’s head, he explained slowly and with difficulty
in spoken words but it was as if a floodgate had opened inside his head.
The Doctor and Dominic both heard him clearly. The illness that affected
his sight and his speech had not affected his power of thought and he
had so much going on in his head.
The Doctor had many long conversations with him in his head. In Philippe
he found a mind that needed stimulus from beyond the confines of his world,
as beautiful as it was. He would tell him, in as much detail as a young
boy could cope with, of his adventures fighting strange monsters and beings
all over the universe. Philippe in turn painted great colourful montages
that expressed what he understood of them.
It was Philippe, in fact, who was the one who asked the question he had
expected one of the children to ask sooner or later. He was twelve, and
Angeletta was sixteen and the youngest player on the village Baton Haute
team that had won a hard played tournament against a league of neighbouring
teams. Three of her male team-mates were vying for her affection as they
celebrated on a warm, but autumnal evening with the scent of turning leaves
on the air.
“Grand-père,” Philippe asked. “Why don’t
you get old?”
“Because he promised me he never would,” Dominique told her
only grandchild. “Long before you were born, ma cherie, he promised
to stay by me till my dying day and never change so much as a freckle
on his face. And he keeps his promises.”
“But does that mean he will go away after you die, grand-mère?
Philippe asked with the honest simplicity of his soul.”
“I don’t know, cherie,” Dominique replied. She smiled
at the boy, then her eyes turned to her husband. The Doctor smiled warmly
at her. She was in her fifties now. Her face was not the same as the young
girl who had swept him off his feet that first day he met her. But he
still loved her just as much as he always did.
“Did I ever tell you how I first met your grand-mère?”
he asked. His colourful description of that day when she stole his hearts
made them all laugh and Dominique blush with pleasure as she remembered
it so very well.
“I am too old for bungee jumping now,” she said. “I
look almost old enough to be his mother. But he still tells me I am beautiful
every night.”
“And so you are,” The Doctor told her. “You always will
be.”
Later that evening he was alone with his son. Philippe was in bed and
Dominique and Thérèse were preparing supper. Angeletta was
on the high walkway with her choice of the young Baton Haute players.
Dominic opened what he knew was an awkward line of conversation.
“You WILL leave after mama… when she is no longer with us?”
he said.
“Yes,” The Doctor said. “I will. I promised her. But
when the time comes, you will be head of the family. You will be head
of the village, too. It’s your right to be both. If I was an ordinary
man, I would die, and you would inherit. I will go, and life will go on
here.”
“Will you come back?” Dominic asked.
“Perhaps,” he said. “When I really am ready to retire
from saving the universe from itself. This has been an interlude. Just
like when I have visited before. But a very much longer one.”
“We need not worry about it yet,” Dominic told him. “But
the children should understand that there will come a time. Especially
Philippe. He will miss you most, I think.”
“I will miss him. But not yet. We have many more years together.
Many more adventures to share.”
There was a finite limit to the life they all enjoyed together. But he
didn’t let it spoil his happiness. He and Dominique were still as
much in love as they were when they first gave themselves to each other.
When he looked at her he didn’t see the lines on her face, the grey
in her hair. He saw the woman he loved and would always love. He saw the
beauty in her soul that had never dimmed. He held her in his arms every
night and they enjoyed every precious day together.
The years passed by. Philippe became a young man, and despite his physical
problems he found work as a carpenter alongside a cousin on his mother’s
side and still painted beautiful pictures in his spare time.
Angeletta became a young wife, and in her turn, a mother of two healthy
children who delighted their grandparents. Dominique didn’t venture
far from her own living quarters these days, so they came to visit her
as often as possible. She and her mother and her sister-in-law Thérèse,
sitting together in the quiet evenings with the children playing at their
feet while The Doctor and Dominic and Philippe talked men’s talk
in a separate huddle.
But last thing at night it was always The Doctor and Dominique sitting
on the swing seat together, holding hands and looking at the stars and
dreaming quiet dreams together, not so much of the future, now, than of
the past. A lot of their conversations began with ‘Remember when….’
And that was all right. Because they had a lot of good times to remember.
The Doctor was happy to remember them with her. Sometimes he would hold
her very close and put his hand on her brow and he could take her back
in her mind and recreate the memories so vividly that when she returned
to the present she was surprised to find her children grown.
He did it more and more as the years began to take their toll on her and
she found it easier some days to stay in bed. Then he was her constant
companion, taking care of her every need, including the need to remember
the sweet times when they were both young.
When she was young, anyway, The Doctor corrected her. He had always been
far older than anyone else on the planet.
“You are still as handsome as you were the day I first met you,”
she told him, reaching her hand out to touch his face. “My lover.
My husband.”
“I’m not THAT handsome,” he replied. “Some people
think I’m quite ugly, you know.”
“Not me,” Dominique assured him. “But I love you for
more than your face. I love the soul within you that loved me from the
first moment.”
“I was going to say that,” he said. “Now I look like
a copy cat.”
“You could have found another woman, a younger one. You could have
left me.”
“No, I couldn’t,” he insisted. “My hearts belong
to you.”
“After I’m gone will you.…”
“No. Nobody could replace you, Dominique. You have fulfilled my
need for that kind of love. I don’t need it any more.”
“You won’t be lonely? I know you mean to go away again, to
the stars. I’ve always known. And I worry about you. The children
will be fine. They have each other. But you… you will be alone again.”
“There’s an old friend I promised to visit thirty-three years
ago,” he told her. “I’ll never be alone. I won’t
be lonely. And I’ll always have your memory. I’ll have the
knowledge that, when I’m ready, when I am ready to give up the universe
completely, my family will be here. I’ll always have a home among
them. But when you’re gone from me, it WILL be time.”
“As long as you’re happy, my Doctor.”
He wasn’t truly happy in those last days as he stayed by her side,
day and night, not wanting to miss a moment of time with her. He tried
to look happy for her. He smiled as he held her in his arms and sang softly
to her. As he administered the medicine that dulled the ache in her bones
he laughed and joked. But inside he was crying because he knew the end
was close. He knew what it would be like. Because he had been here before.
He had loved a woman to the end before. His first wife, mother of his
first son, Susan’s grandmother, had been a Human who grew old and
died, too. He had done the same things for her as the weeks became days,
then days became hours as he knew they must.
Other members of the family came to see her. Dominic and Angeletta sat
by her side for many long hours. Philippe showed her his latest paintings.
Claude and Rémy, Angeletta’s boys, found it hard not to cry.
But in the end, The Doctor sat with her alone. He knew the family were
outside, close by. But it was just the two of them. At her request he
took her on one of those memory journeys. He put the visions in her mind
of a warm evening just like this evening, when they walked high up in
the trees and looked at the stars. He told her the names of many of them.
He told her the planets that orbited them, and about the kinds of people
who lived there. She had sighed and said it was wonderful to know, but
she was happy to live on Forêt in peace. She had no need to meet
those people from strange planets.
Seventy five years she had lived on Forêt. Except for the brief
time when he took her away on honeymoon to the Eye of Orion she had not
travelled more than twenty miles from her home village. But she didn’t
feel short-changed. She had lived a full life and lived it well. And for
thirty-three of those years the man she loved had been at her side.
“I am happy,” she told him. Then she closed her eyes and slowly
he felt her slip away. He felt her heart stop and her breathing fail.
She was dead in his arms. He cried inconsolably. He knew Dominic had felt
it through him. Philippe, too. Outside, they were all grieving as well.
Soon he would have to let them in. But he needed his own time with her,
first.
“Goodbye, my Dominique,” he said as he laid her down in the
bed and put her arms by her side and made her hair neat. “I will
miss you.” Then he let the others come and say their goodbyes while
he went and sat up on the high platform, quietly, alone, and cried.
He cried most of that day. He cried when she was buried in the ground
beneath the trees of the village, somewhere quite close to where her brother
had been buried may years before. Because they didn’t have gravestones
or markers it was hard to be sure. Afterwards, he stopped crying. He let
his hearts mend. He took consolation in the family they had made together.
But he stood by what he had said. One day he and Dominic pulled down the
planks that for so long had hidden the TARDIS. It was strange to see it
again. But it seemed like a familiar friend.
“Will it work still?” Dominic asked.
“Oh, yes,” The Doctor assured him. “She’s Time
Lord technology. Thirty-three years is just a quiet nap for her.”
He went to the workroom and found the key, still on the nail by the roof.
He unlocked the door and went inside. The console was mostly dark, but
there was a faint green light that proved it still had power. At a touch
from him it came alive. The overhead lights came on. He saw his clothes
that he hadn’t worn for so long. He took them and changed into them.
Shirt and suit and tie and shoes and socks. Dominic looked surprised to
see him dressed that way. He had almost forgotten. Angeletta and Phillippe,
and the children had never seen him looking like that. It served as proof
that he really did mean to leave them.
He stayed a few more days. He ran a diagnostic programme on the TARDIS,
just to be sure it was working. He chided himself it WAS a delay tactic.
Maybe it was. But he did need the delay. He needed to prepare to leave
what had become familiar for the unfamiliar and uncertain and sometimes
frightening.
“Goodbye, Grand-père,” said the two youngest sadly.
He kissed them both and hugged them tightly. Philippe, next. He had prepared
him for this parting for a long time, but it was still painful. Angeletta
was sad to say goodbye to her father, but she, too, had known it was going
to happen.
“Will you come back?” she asked. “Please say you will,
papa.”
“I will visit from time to time,” he said. “To make
sure you’re all safe and well. And if there is any trouble of the
sort we had when your mother was younger, people trying to take away this
precious world of yours, there is still the crystal. I will come if you
need me.”
Dominic and Angeletta went with him to the platform. He told the others
to stay away. By the TARDIS door he kissed both his children lovingly.
Dominic was a fine, strong man. He would make a good village leader. Angeletta
was going to have more babies yet and be a good mother. But it was time
they both did it for themselves, without him.
“Goodbye,” he said at last and he stepped into the TARDIS.
“No regrets, no anxieties. Just have a good life, my children. Have
a fantastic life.”
The TARDIS dematerialised. Dominic had seen it before. Angeletta had only
been told of it and was surprised and alarmed. But her brother held her
by the shoulders and pointed up. He waved at the empty sky.
“Safe journey, father,” he said.
“Have a fantastic life,” he said again as he programmed the
destination. Earth, 21st century, an hour after he left Manchester thirty-three
years ago. He was a Time Lord. He had, for once, taken advantage of that
fact. He had lived a life, a full life. And now he had all the time in
the universe to go on living, doing what he had always done.
“Oh, Doctor.” Wyn held his hands tightly as he smiled through
his tears. “Oh, I am so sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry for,” he told her. “I’m the
luckiest man in the universe. I had that wonderful life with the woman
I loved. I had my beautiful children with me. I lived life one day after
the other, like any ordinary man. And now I am ready to be a Time Lord
again, living my life yesterday and tomorrow and last year.”
“So WHEN did you get around to visiting us?” Stella asked.
“Five years ago, when I was sixteen, when mum and dad wanted to
go to South Africa for twelve months and I didn’t want to go, and
you suggested that me and Wyn could come and spend a year with you….
When you found out that Robin Meyerson was an android.”
“Who’s Robin Meyerson?” The Doctor asked.
“The horrible teen boy singer she had the hots for when she was
sixteen,” Wyn reminded him with a disgusted tone. “You don’t
remember us finding out that he was actually a prototype artificial life
form?”
“No,” The Doctor said. “I haven’t….”
“Oh hell!” Wyn worked it out. “Doctor… that’s
something you haven’t DONE yet. You’ve come to see us NOW,
BEFORE you saw us then. You haven’t DONE those things.”
“Don’t say anything else for now, then,” he warned her.
“Especially not about Robin Reliant or whatever his name was. Though
the heads up about him might cut a few corners. Obviously I AM going to
see you five years ago, and it looks like we’re going to have some
fun, the three of us.” He looked at them both. Their faces were
inscrutable. “It WAS fun, wasn’t it?”
“MOST of it was,” Wyn told him. “The slug guys were
yukky. And Stella snivelling about Robin for hours was a pain. But yeah,
it was fun.”
“Ok, I don’t need to know any more about the slug guys right
now, either. Let’s try not to cause any more paradoxes. But apparently
my future involves spending a year travelling the universe with you two.
I can live with that.”
“Don’t go yet,” Stella protested. “We haven’t
seen you in five years. If we don’t talk about that time, will you
stay for a day or two?”